So much to learn from lesson on pain and suffering

Dear All:

When I was healthy, I never never thought of praying almost hourly since there are so many thing to do around me and there is no such need. However with this pain, it is a CONSTANT battle, Satan will always whisper discouraging words to me especially in the middle of night when the fever starts to reach the tip off point. Particularly on THursday and Friday evening, when I want so much to be in person on Sunday, however, lying in bed with fever over 38 will cause so much anxiety as though I might end up in hospital.
Saturday I was admitted into Cancer clinic and they told me that if I had infection, they will keep me there until Sunday. I was so worried. however, the result did not show a high level of white cell, so I was given antibiotic since I got UTI. I was thankful that I got out of hospital on Saturday.

That was another battle won.

On Monday I went for second  chemo. I was extremely tired since the red blood cell drops below to low level, so they decided to give me another Chemo anyway but go back the next day for blood transfusion. I had 2 bags which lasted 3 hours, and of course when I am done, I can only crawl into bed and slept until the next morning since  I have no more energy left

I found out that when you are sick, there is absolutely NOTHING I can do. I cannot even lift up a cup with full water, and I have to be EXTRA careful since my hands starts to shake sometimes and I will spill the whole ensure on the floor. To both John and me, It is a major disaster since I cannot bend down neither can he. Will have to wait till the son to clean up. How fragile we human beings are.

This week will be my lowest point in immunity since both the red and white cell will be going down. So will be lying in bed for one week, and then go for another blood test on May 16th to see whether I can still go on with Chemo.

Now it is one day at a time.

The good news is that I listen to ALL sermon on line, every single church that I am interested in. Lots and lots of hymns. That is a luxury that one do not have if not because of sickness.

Poor John, being a primary care taker is quite a job for him
He doesn’t want me to get confused with morphine, antibiotics,laxative,benedryl etc. And I must have morphine every 4 hours to stop the pain. SO we are in the process of getting help to allow him to rest and go outside.

I would never have imagine that I have to be taken care by my 12 year’s older husband, and I am usually healthy and fast. Well, that is life, you never know but through it all, we are so much closer to GOD. which is a priceless blessing

Thank you all prayer partners. If you need someone to pray for you, I got lots of time and can do it for you.

Shirley

Prayer request:

Mom is coming on May 16th, just pray that I will line up help for her and how to break the news to her.
Need to figure out the details when she comes, I am sure when the time comes, God will give me a way out.